Stressful Nothingness

I never would have guessed that my stress levels would INCREASE after graduating college. So many kids look forward to that day as the day all their stress goes away. But for me it was the opposite. Now I have to think about getting a job, what my career is going to be, what I am going to do with myself, what I want to be, what I'm going to make of myself as an adult. When I was in school, I had a routine, I had friends, parties, school work, school job, tests and church and it was simple. Now I feel like I am building from ground zero. The worst part is I don't really know what I want to do (career wise). But it is a good experience, its a challenge. Looking back, having things to do is a good thing. Not having specific things to do stresses me out. Part of me just likes to be told what to do. Decisions are tough. Because if I make a decision and end up not liking it I beat myself up because I could have chosen something else. But at the same time, its so great that we can choose. Choice is a gift from God. And I think, I'm glad I can choose who I want to be. I can be anything. Anyway, just some food for thought.